Speech Giving Basics

We know that a wedding might be the first time you have given a formal speech in front of such a large crowd. Because of this, chances are that you may be nervous. That's okay because most people giving those special speeches probably feel the same way. A big part of public speaking is those little butterflies that you get in your stomach as you wait for your turn to come up. Weddings are just the most common reason (outside of work) to have to do it.

One thing that makes wedding speeches so scary is because the people that are at a wedding all waiting for that one speech that will leave the couple speechless. The trick to giving a great speech is learning how to turn that nervous energy into a memorable speech! Here are some things that you will want to remember when it comes to giving a speech.

1. Everyone gets nervous with public speaking it is not just you. It's one of the scariest things in the world for most people. In fact, some people are more scared of public speaking than they are of dying!

2. You are going to be speaking to a very supportive, close, and interested audience when you are at a wedding. They are anxious to hear what you will say. Those who will be listening to you give your speech are there because they love and respect each other and not because they expect you to give a perfect speech. No matter what happens while you're up there, they'll all be proud of you because you tried.

There are a few things that you should really think about when you're writing your speech that can make it a great deal easier to give. And speeches that are easier to give are generally less scary, easier for your audience to listen to, and more effective as well. Here are some quick ideas to making your speech easier to write.

• Start off with a good hook to draw them in. People will be listening to a lot of speeches at a wedding, and you want yours to stand out. The best way to do that is to start by saying something that will catch their attention. This can be in the form of a personal story, or a hypothetical scenario that will make people think, or an anecdote about the couple etc. Anything that shows why you care about the couple or why other people should too will make your audience WANT to listen to what you have to say.
• Once you have made them want to listen, you'll want to make it as easy as possible for them to follow your speech throughout. The most effective way to do this, right after your hook is used, is to map out where your speech will go. For example: If you are planning to make your speech a funny one or sentimental.
• After you've mapped out your speech, all you have to do is follow your speech map. However you are hoping to speak about the couple, be sure not to drift from it. My favorite wedding speeches and toasts are those that offer both humor and sentiment.

Public speaking will probably always be scary to you no matter how many speeches you give or how many techniques that you practice. In a way, that's what makes it so fun, and so important. But with a little bit of practice, anyone can give an effective speech or toast at a wedding that will in time make it a bit easier.

Since so much of what goes into a wedding is revolved around speeches and toasts etc. it helps to know how you plan to go about it. If you are a maid of honor or best man, you could wind up giving a dozen different speeches and toasts. Rehearsal dinners, showers, bachelor parties and of course receptions will have you giving a speech or toast at all of them. That is why you need to be prepared.

There are some more things that you have to consider when you are writing your speech as well. Since all of your speeches are going to be different, you need to know exactly what you are going to say in a general sense so that you can prepare your speech. Here is a short list of the most important questions that you must consider before writing your speech.

What kind of speech do I plan to make? (humorous, poetic, sentimental)
How long will my speech be?
What is my role in this wedding ie. Father of the bride, best man, maid of honor, bridesmaid etc.
What type of impression am I hoping to give?
Is this a first wedding or second?
How well do I know the couple?
How long have I known the couple?
How do I want the couple to remember my speech?

Finding the answers to the following questions about the Bride and Groom will also help you find your inspiration, and find out what you really want to include in your speech. Don't hold back in this area, write down everything that comes to mind...you will have plenty of time to edit the content later. Here are some more questions that you should ask.

- How long have you known the Groom? And how or where did you meet?
- How did the Bride and Groom meet? Were you involved in a relationship before?
- How did the Groom ask bride to marry him? And what was her immediate reaction?
- How long has the Bride and Groom been a couple?
- Do they have children already?
- What are the Bride and Groom's mutual interests?
- What 5 words come to mind when you think of the Groom and the bride as well?
- What is the funniest thing that happened to the Groom while Bride was around or missing in action? And vice-versa?
- What is the funniest thing that happened to the Groom (or Bride) while you were around?
- What would you like the future to hold for the Bride and Groom?

The questions above are more important that you might think. When you answer them, you can certainly decrease your options which will make your writing efforts a great deal easier. Naturally the more questions you ask the better your speech will be.